


Mixed feelings

by FlyingEgg



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Crabbe and Goyle are there but don't do much, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-23
Updated: 2017-05-01
Packaged: 2018-10-23 04:32:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10712241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlyingEgg/pseuds/FlyingEgg
Summary: It's Potions class and Draco and Harry get paired up.





	1. Potions Class

"All you'll need is your book!"

"I don't want to go back to my dorm to get it again!" Ron complained,

Hermione had told Ron to put away his quills, ink, and parchment as Snape had specifically demanded that they carry only their essentials for today's potion class.

"There won't be any room for us or the Ravenclaws on the desks!"

the small bitter argument had gone on for a few minutes before Ron had given up and left his writing supplies back at the Common Room.

Harry saw that the Potions class' door was being flooded with students. Hermione, Harry, and Ron pushed their way into the crowd, being greeted with nasty ruckus from the students yelling at eachother.

 "Hey, watch where you're going!"

 "You stepped on my foot!"

 "Idiot!"

 "Shut up!"

The insults and commotion continued as the three houses tried to fit all in one classroom. Harry, Hermione, and Ron were trying to squeeze through the people to get to their regular seats.

"Hermione? Remind me again why the Ravenclaws are here?" Ron asked as he felt a shoe dig into his waist.

"I'm not sure, but — ouch! Sorry- something to do with Hagrid that made them — Excuse me, we're trying to get through! Sorry- something that made them miss out on their Potions class."

"Did they have to do it the same time as ours?" Harry pushed a random Slytherin kid out of their way.

"Harry, don't push! In any case, if they didn't, all the Hufflepuffs would have to revise their schedules along with the Gryffindors." Hermione explained, "This may be tedious, but it's the most cost-effective way to go with organising the houses— besides, here's our seat!"

Hermione and Ron slid into their seat first, just as Harry was about to sit down he felt something strike his back and he got driven down to the side of the seat in front of them.

"What?—"

"Don't get your filthy hands all over me!" Harry heard a familiar voice shout, quite sharply. Harry ignored whoever said it and pushed through the crowd to his seat only to see two other students were already in it.

"Harry, we tried to save it— but Professor Snape put them there!" Hermione yelled over the crowd. Harry had completely forgotten that Snape was still in the classroom with them.  
"Potter, are you having difficulty finding a place to sit?" He turned around and saw Snape looking straight at him.

"Huh? No — I was just about to sit down there." Harry pointed to the seat he got pushed down to before. Snape gave him a doubtful look.

"Sit then. The lesson will begin soon." Snape turned around and walked to the front of the classroom.

Harry shot an unnoticed glare at Snape and slid into the seat beside whoever was there. Harry didn't pay attention to who he sat beside, he was more focused on Neville and Luna who took a seat beside him. He felt relieved that he was still around his friends, yet Neville looked anxious when he met Harry's eyes, his focus was behind Harry.

Harry was about to turn around when he spotted Crabbe and Goyle scowling at him.

"You're in our seat," Crabbe growled at the trio.  
Harry was about to open his mouth to say something when Snape did it for him.

"Crabbe, Goyle, find a seat, I will not tolerate excessive squabbling."

Crabbe and Goyle left reluctantly to the other side of the room.

Harry was confused as to why Crabbe and Goyle would want his seat — but instead of thinking about it — he dug into his bag.

He was glad he wouldn't have to put up with them.

Harry took out his book, as he was about to place it on the table, he felt his elbow brush against someone else's. He turned to face the student who was beside him.

Harry realised why they wanted to sit in his seat, he could not have chosen a worse spot to sit in.

He and Draco were staring holes into each other.

Well, Harry was staring, Draco was looking at Harry with a great loathing mixed with amusement.

Harry slowly turned his head behind him to see Ron looking disbelieved and Hermione looking worried. Harry quickly turned his head back to the front of the class not uttering a word to Draco.

"As you may have noticed, our classroom is populated with more students than usual," Snape was clearly not enjoying the extra company.

"The number of people will not stop the education of today's lesson, in fact, I'm glad the houses are scattered here and there, it will contribute to the lesson." Snape's frown shifted to a satisfied look.

"You all are familiar with Veritaserum by now, and I expect that now that Valentine's Day is over, you are all familiar with the Love Potion as well."

Snape pointed his wand at the board. "Today you and your partner will make both and then combine them. The partner on the right will make Veritaserum and the partner on the left will make a Love Potion, you will then mix the two. After, you will put them into two glass bottles. The color should be crystal clear if made correctly."

Snape put his wand back into cloak. "Now can anyone tell me what happens if you take this mixture of Veritaserum and Love Potion?"

Hermione's hand immediately shot into the air, but so did all the Ravenclaw students, excluding Luna who was picking at a bizarre looking root she seemed to have gotten from under the table.

"You, over there, answer." He pointed at a honey-haired Ravenclaw girl.

"If you and your partner take the mixture, the potion will change its color to match the mood of who you're looking at!" The girl explained proudly.

"To put it in better words, if you look at, say, someone you have romantic feelings for, your potion would turn a bright pink. If you look at someone you detest, it would turn a dark black. And if neither, it's color will not change and stay clear." Snape waved his wand and the chalkboard flipped to reveal instructions.

"Of course not everyone's feelings fall into these three categories, there will be a wide range of different patterns, hues, and glow of each potion representing the student's mood for one another."

A dark-haired Slytherin boy raised his hand.

"Yes?"

"Why wouldn't you just use regular Veritaserum?" He asked.

"Can anyone tell me why you wouldn't use regular Veritaserum?" Snape questioned the class.

  
The same regular hands shot up. Snape, realising that if he chose any Ravenclaws he'd barely receive an answer, choose Hermione.

"If you use this kind of mixture instead of regular Veritaserum, the victim won't tell their answer out loud, and you'll get a good idea of what your victim thinks of you instead of a vague vocal answer, this mixture is clear like Veritaserum which means you can easily slip it into any drink and watch it change colors from afar. Though — obviously, —you should never do this. This mixture does not have a name and is not well known." Hermione answered confidently.

"Not only that, even if tampered, the potion will still show it's—"

"Thank you, Miss Granger!" Snape interrupted.

"Now, the instructions are on the board and I have stocked well on ingredients," Snape said as Draco's hand shot up in the air. "Yes, Malfoy?"

"Do we absolutely have to drink it, Professor?" Draco asked, "I wouldn't want mine to end up a sickly black colour." Draco jeered, earning him a laugh from the Slytherin students.

"Yes, Malfoy, it's a requirement. Otherwise, I couldn't grade you on the 'tasting' portion of your 'Tasting and Making' category of Potions class. Though, if Potter chooses to posion you I'll stop him immediately." Snape gave him a quick smile and turned to face the entire class.

Harry noticed Draco got much tenser.

"Alright class, your time starts... Now!"

The many students went over to the cupboards and started picking out the ingredients. Harry thought he could probably purposely sabotage the potion just so he wouldn't have to take it.

"He's still going to grade it though isn't he," Harry thought and decided he'd at least try to get a good grade this time.  
Harry rummaged through the cupboard trying to find the right ingredients when he heard a small "Come on now..." far from the crowd. He popped his head up and looked across where he saw Draco rummaging and choosing the wrong ingredients.

Draco kept digging until he found an ink bottle and pocketed it before returning to his station. Harry thought that Draco had the same idea of sabotaging the potion and was going through with it, that or he was trying to make Harry swallow ink.

"Great," Harry thought, "He's going to make me drink ink and get a good laugh. Or was that poison? He's going to poison me! No— cant be, he's drinking it too."

Harry hadn't even noticed he was the only one left near the cupboards and the rest of the students were returning back to their stations. Harry quickly picked up his things and sat back down at his seat.

It was odd working alongside Draco, there weren't many taunts or mockings as he thought there would be, in fact, it looked as if Draco was nervous about something. If Harry didn't know any better he'd guess Draco was on the verge of passing out.

Harry turned his head around to see how Neville and Luna were doing. Neville was struggling to grind his moonstone to powder in his mortar and pestle while Luna was plucking off peppermint leaves from their stems.

Harry thought maybe he could initiate conversation somehow but everyone looked like they were busy. Usually, there was quiet chatter and conversation going on, but everyone seemed to be working hard. Everyone but Harry.

Harry decided that he wouldn't like to get a failing grade, so he started grinding the pearls, which proved to be much harder than he originally thought it would be.

He managed to finish the potion in the nick of time and saw that Draco was long done and was anxiously staring at his potion.

"Malfoy."

Draco's head snapped up to meet Harry's, Draco was acting weird, almost too panicky.

"If you're done can we mix them now?" Harry asked calmly, he'd never seen someone so distressed.

"Oh— right! Yeah... Right!" Draco quickly fixed his posture and image, his face quickly went back to his usual smug look, "Say, Potter, since when do you actually know how to make a potion?" Draco mocked.

"Yeah- alright, Malfoy." Something was wrong with Draco, and Harry really wasn't buying the vain mask Draco had going on. It was almost blatantly noticeable that Draco was still very hysterical.

"Alright just hold yours still, I'm going to tip mine in."

Harry tilted his cauldron into Draco's and it drained along with the colour of Draco's face.

The color of the concoction was clear but he noticed some small clouds in it, grabbing a spoon he mixed it until the small patches of gray were gone. He quickly scooped the contents of the cauldron with two glass bottles and shoved one in Draco's hand.

"Your time is up!" Snape snapped, "I know how incapable some students are," Snape said as he shot a scowl at Ron.

Hermione had to create both Veritaserum and the Love Potion because Ron kept messing up.

"That is why I have prepared a fresh batch in case." Snape waved his wand and his cauldron's liquid traveled into each of the lined up glass bottles lined up on the table. "Now there are no excuses for why you cannot take the potion."

Professor Snape started on the bottom right, he looked down at a pair of student's cauldron and scribbled down some things and then told them to drink their potion.

All the students watched as the Ravenclaw girl with gold hair and pigtails, and a Slytherin boy with short brown hair, chugged down the potion facing each other. Both of their potions turned a hot pink and the class "Oooh'd" and a couple of Slytherins gave the boy high fives and a "Nice, man!" While the girls poked fun at the Ravenclaw girl and teased her.

This continued for a long time. Some potions turned green; which symbolized a great friendship, and some turned blue; which meant they'd like to be friends only. A couple drank the potion and the girl's potion turned a dark purple while the male's turned a gray-pink.

Harry turned to look beside him and saw that Draco looked very uneasy and was even shaking a bit.

"Draco, hey, you alright?" Harry would've rather had him insulting everyone than in this state.

"Since when do you care whether I'm alright or not, Potter?" Draco snapped back giving him a bitter smile. Scratch that, Harry would've rather had Draco in this state than him insulting everyone.

"OK, look, let's just put aside this whole 'rivals' thing for a second, you don't look so good." And it might've been true, Draco's already pale face was paler than usual.

Harry put a hand on his shoulder and Draco winced at the contact. He let his hand sit for a couple of seconds before he jerked his shoulder back and let Harry's hand fall to his side.

"Fine— fine, I'm fine, okay?" Draco mumbled and was avoiding eye contact with Harry. Harry left Draco alone, he probably needed time to think on his own or something, he had no clue about why Draco was acting all up and about for.

Snape was very close to them now, he was recording Hermione and Ron's potion that kept flashing bright green, dark purple, and for less than a millisecond, bright pink.

Neville and Luna's potion didn't turn out even close to what it was supposed to look like. It was clear, but there were mud coloured swirls that dappled the liquid.

Snape wrote down their failure and waved his wand where the last two glass bottles full of the perfect mixture gently fell into their hands.

When they drank it, it had turned into a bright gold. No one was sure what it meant, but it must've meant something good.

Snape finally approached Harry and Draco. Draco was trying to look like his usual conceited self, and Harry noticed, failing almost miserably.

"This potion is mediocre, but it'll work." Professor Snape wrote down a couple of things and looked back at them. "Drink."

Harry turned to look at Draco and saw that he was hiding his potion under the table, doing something with it. Whatever it was, Harry didn't care.

They both drank their potions at the same time and then looked down at their glasses. Harry's potion turned a color that looked somewhat similar to a dark grape wine with small black specks scattered throughout it. It didn't glow purple though, instead, it was radiating a bubblegum-like colour. Draco's meanwhile turned pure black. Harry wasn't surprised or hurt it was obvious Draco didn't like him. He was more confused at his own potion than Draco's at the moment.

Snape scribbled down the results and went back to the front of the classroom to lecture the class about something. He noticed Draco was holding his potion back under the table and stared at it.

His eyes shifted to the corner of the desk, there was an open ink bottle that looked like it was spilled open or tampered with. Draco's foot pushed it aside into the corner of their desk.

Almost instantly as Harry's eyes darted from the Ink bottle back to the potion it slowly turned neon pink.

Neon was an understatement, Harry didn't think he'd see anything so bright ever again. It was exactly as Snape had described it. A potion glowing bright pink.

The black ink was completely gone by now. Harry's eyes were wide and immediately looked behind him. Hermione met his stare and her eyes were wide too. It seemed only the two of them had known what it had actually looked like.

Harry quickly scooped up more of the potion into another empty glass and hid it in his cloak for later use.

Draco had made the mistake of accidentally getting a drop of the potion in his mouth when he had faked drinking it. Not noticing that Harry and Hermione had seen it the elixir, he waved his wand and the cauldron along with his own drink both vanished. Draco let out a sigh of relief and the colour returned back to his face.

"Class dismissed," Snape said and went to go clean up for the next batch of students.

Draco immediately got up, not stopping to even glance at Harry, and left with Crabbe and Goyle. Harry hastily said goodbye to Luna and Neville and he ran towards Hermione and Ron, heading out with them and anxiously wanting to discuss what he just saw with them both.


	2. Glass half empty.

Draco did know he looked obviously fake when he was acting spiteful or malicious towards Harry, he was never a good liar to begin with.

He didn't care if everyone else could see through his disguise, he just hoped Harry had believed him.

He convinced himself that he didn't have feelings for Harry — Draco would point out how impossible it was to himself all the time.

 Yet there he was, laying on his bed, remembering the time from when he was filling up his drink with ink in potions class.

He hated ever being that close to Harry, It was almost too close for Draco to bare. Obviously, he'd never been that close to Harry to start with, aside from when he and Harry were fighting, yet Harry had never touched him like that unless he was throwing a punch towards Draco's way.

And now all his thoughts were occupied with Harry, he wanted to occupy his thoughts with something else, the only other thing he could think of were other people who actually liked him in that sort of way.

Pansy Parkinson liked him a lot. He didn't think much of her, she was somewhat okay in looks. Draco thought she was too hard-faced, she was just not that appealing to Draco in general. A good friend? Sure. But he even knew some boys were better-looking than her.

 Pansy seemed to be the only girl who was remotely interested in him, which didn't make his chances with anyone else that good.

  
Draco lifted his head up from his pillow. It had only been a day since potions class with Harry, but Draco knew he'd be thinking about it for weeks to come. Draco hated Harry and Harry hated him. He didn't have a clue about what caused that kind of reaction from the potion in the first place.

Clearly, he did though, it was his 'feelings'

He hated his feelings, he couldn't even think of many girls he liked to begin with, he hated how weird he was and how out of place he felt. He liked all the wrong people, he couldn't get his romantic feelings in order, and he treated said liked-people horribly.

Draco thought it was almost kind of funny, in a weird, dark, twisted way.  
  
Draco got up from his bed and straightened out his clothes and brushed his hair. He'd look like even more of a mess if he stayed in his dorm all day. Draco wondered where were Crabbe and Goyle were off to, he figured they were off messing around with other students.

He started walking towards the stone wall. Draco stepped out from behind the wall, out of the dungeon, and onto the floor of the hallway. He'd just take a quick walk alone, that's all.

* * *

  
"Maybe something was in the cauldron before he made the Veritaserum?" Ron suggested, he was sprawled out on his armchair in front of the fire. Harry had just finished telling them about what happened in potions class.

"No, that wouldn't be it, Professor Snape always cleans out the cauldrons carefully after class," Hermione said, "Do you honestly think he'd make that mistake?"

"Okay, maybe the ink somehow turned it pink?" Ron asked.

"Ink doesn't love Harry, Ron." Hermione rested her head against her hand, "Harry, do you still have that bottle?"

"Huh? Oh, you mean the spare potion? Yeah, but what are we going to do with it?" Harry was absent-mindedly staring into the fire, doing his own thinking about how Draco's drink turned out that way.

"Well, first, we could split it and then give one half to Malfoy untampered?" Hermione proposed "And then, we can watch the other half here."

"Right, of course, he'd just take up a drink we offered him kindly without any hesitation," Ron said, sarcastically.

"We don't have to be the ones directly giving him the drink, we could trick him," Hermione suggested.

"Yeah, and how will we manage to do that?" Harry asked.

"I'm not entirely sure, we could slip it into his glass of pumpkin juice or water."

"Hey, actually, Harry could pretend to trip or something and spill the water all over his face!" Ron grinned.

"What? No — Ron, that's rude!"

"When has Malfoy not been rude? Besides, if Harry does it — Malfoy won't accidentally look at another girl or something. Harry could just stare at him after doing it."

"That could work..." Harry said while sloshing around the liquid in the bottle and watching the fireplace's glow reflecting off of it.  
  
Hermione looked like she was trying to think of something else to do.

"I mean, I could just toss it on him while he's talking, so at least one drop gets into his mouth," Harry mumbled, still focused on the bottle of liquid.

There was more silent pondering until Hermione spoke,

"Alright, alright! pass the bottle over here."

* * *

 

Harry walked along the school's corridor, clutching a glass of 'water', and looking for any sign of Draco. Something hit Harry in the back of his head that said if Draco was walking with Crabbe and Goyle he'd be slugged for sure. Draco just needed a glance of him, that's all, he'd just jinx them if they got in the way or run away after.

Harry kept walking, his eyes darting around the students who passed him. Harry didn't know why he was doing this, he obviously could be attending to much more important things in this time, like practicing Quidditch. Perhaps it was his intense curiosity for an explanation.

He always thought Draco was a jerk, and it was obvious he was, and he did hate him, for the most part anyway. Draco's drink might've turned pink, but that was no excuse for why his own drink turned the colour it did.

Maybe Harry was just thinking too hard about it, he did see some black in it so that must've meant something.

Harry snapped out of his thoughts and realised he just passed Draco. He turned his head around and saw Draco was now walking on his own without Crabbe and Goyle, not even realising that he just walked past Harry himself.

Harry quickly turned around and shuffled towards Draco, he was now behind him, pacing silently and only seeing his back. Harry didn't know how to make this water-tossing subtle.

Harry followed Draco all around the school until Draco had ended up in an empty hallway.

  
He quickly walked beside Draco and passed him, then he turned around so that now he and Draco were face to face. Draco stopped dead in his tracks and gave Harry an irritated look.

"Do you mi-"

Harry threw the glass of water in Draco's face before he could finish.

At first, Draco was too stunned to reply, and then the anger seeped in. Draco was furious, there had been no justifiable reason for Harry to do that unless Harry really did hate Draco's guts and wanted to make Draco's day horrible.

Draco gave Harry a crooked grin as he spoke.  
  
"You think this is really funny don't you, Potter? You think this is some kind of joke—" Harry shoved his face in front of Draco's face, invading his personal space.

Now they were really eye-to-eye. Draco couldn't even finish his sentence, he felt flustered and his face was starting to redden. Draco didn't have a clue about what to do, and neither did Harry, until Draco closed his eyes and shoved Harry to the ground hard before quickly fleeing to who knows where.

Draco just wanted to run away from him, yet his thoughts were still clouded with images of what had just happened. He kept running until he found himself in an empty corridor and slumped down against the wall.

His face felt hot and his heart was beating much faster than he'd like it to beat, he wiped the water off his face with his sleeve.

Draco thought he was so, so, stupid. He should've gotten out of his seat the moment Harry sat down in potion's class. That must've been the thing that triggered these weird thoughts and events.

He just couldn't though, because he _wanted_ to sit beside him.  
  
He was always acting stupidly aloof, he just didn't want those kinds of feelings, at least not for Harry. Maybe he 'liked' Harry because of how much Harry was the opposite of him. Sure, Draco didn't have the same beliefs like Harry did, If he did Harry would probably like him more. Did he even want Harry to like in the first place?

"Obviously, you imbecile..." Draco grumbled, tilting his head back so that it also touched the wall. He was a Slytherin, a pure blood, coming from a death eater family, he had no say in what he wanted to do, especially with a Gryffindor. Besides he'd rather have the approval of a whole house than a few stupid people. Yet only half of him meant that. He knew he was sugar coating his own thoughts, in reality, what he really meant would be that he'd rather be 'popular' with his own kind of people than loved by some friends. And maybe that was why he was so sour.  
  
Harry did almost nothing and yet he had people who loved him other than his relatives.

Draco knew that wasn't true. Harry did a lot, Draco just didn't know what. Draco thought he should really start caring more, and possibly try getting less worked up about every small thing that didn't go his way.

He did feel remorse sometimes, he was still human after all, but just not human enough. His own emotions seemed to control Draco more than he himself did. It'd be nice for someone to love him, aside from his family of course, but even he felt like they didn't love him as much as everyone loved Harry.

He wanted someone who wasn't forced to love him. Perhaps Draco didn't even know what love had felt like, he tried to convince himself he wouldn't like it if he ever got the chance, but that was a lie. Harry had everything Draco didn't, he was brilliant in whatever he liked to do and stunning during it.

Draco did think Harry looked charming, even though he'd hate to admit it. To any other eye, Harry probably looked like a messy slob or a regular boy. The weird way that Harry never brushed his hair could get Draco staring. Or the odd times where Harry's glasses would be lopsided or askew on his face, Draco just wanted to take them off and put them back on Harry's face correctly.

Instead, he always acted harshly around Harry. That's what Draco always did when he didn't know what else to feel or how to control new foreign feelings, act harshly. Of course, sometimes he did really hate Harry, he could get Draco's blood boiling, but he knew it a strong part of it came from jealousy and he only seemed to regret it later.

Draco often thought he was being charming by making bold remarks towards the Gryffindors, it was obvious that no one thought the same way.

Draco resented his temper, it got in the way of everything. Maybe if he acted 'kind' towards Harry he'd get the hint, part of him even hoped he saw the potion without the ink. Yet Harry instead repaid Draco by throwing water on his face. He hated that Harry would be comfortable enough to do that without feeling any remorse, it reminded Draco too much about himself. Draco wondered if he'd even like it if Harry loved him back.

Yet Draco already knew the answer to that. He groaned and picked himself up. His robes were soaked and so was his hair, he went back to his dorm to get himself a new change of clothes.

* * *

 

Harry was on the floor, wide-eyed and sore.

He didn't need the results of the potion to tell him Draco certainly felt something other than resentment for Harry, he could see it all on Draco's face. Harry stood up and brushed off the dust on his uniform. He kept staring into the distance where Draco had run off to, until he decided to turn around and meet up with Hermione and Ron.


	3. Hallway walkings

"Is that it?" Harry asked.

"Yeah, that's it," Ron replied.

Harry walked in on Hermione and Ron sitting in their armchairs in front of the fire and staring at a bright bottle of pink that was placed on the table. There was silence between them. Most of the other Gryffindor students were heading to bed.

"What now?" Hermione asked.

"I don't think there's anything we can do now." Ron looked away from the bottle to Hermione. "We should just leave things the way it is."

"Wait, but aren't we going to do anything with this information?" Hermione looked towards Harry, "We'll have to talk to him about it or something, right?"

"Why would we? Harry doesn't even like that git back." Ron also turned towards Harry.

"Well, he doesn't hate him that much, remember his own potion?"

"Yeah... Actually — I do! Harry, what was up with that?"

Harry had no answer for Ron, how was he supposed to know? He'd been zoning out for some time, thinking about what had happened in the hallway.

"I don't know." Harry blurted out.

"Don't worry, that's actually a perfect answer," Hermione said, almost too proudly, as if she had been waiting for this exact moment.

"How exactly?" Ron's gaze shifted from Harry to Hermione.

"Well, Harry's drink was purple, wasn't it? And purple is the color of uncertainty."

"How do you know purple is uncertainty?"

"Do you remember the couple in potions class? The one that started dating a week ago? The girl's potion turned purple, while the boy's turned pink." Hermione dug into her pocket and took out a small piece of folded paper.

"If you saw them during the week they first started going out, the girl was oddly distant. I've recorded all the colors here on this piece of paper during potion's class." She unfolded it and handed it to Harry.

"Is that all the evidence? I mean we only saw a few people with the colour purple."

"I'm sure its uncertainty, didn't you see my potion? Not that I'm uncertain about anything! I'm just as confused as you are of course!" Hermione's eyes avoided Ron's look.

Harry looked at the color code sheet. Alright, so he had some black specks, which was hatred, obviously, he had purple, and then there was the bubblegum glow which is closer to pink than anything. Right, pink. Harry didn't even want to think about that. He folded back the paper and gave it back to Hermione without saying anything.

"Harry, what are you going to do?" Hermione asked

"I'll tell you both tomorrow, It's late and we should get some sleep," Harry muttered.

"Oh, alright then. Goodnight, you both." Hermione hastily got up and started walking upstairs to the girl's dorm. Harry grabbed the pink bottle and Ron and him both walked to their dorm without saying anything to each other.

* * *

 

It had been a couple of hours since Harry first got into bed. He'd been staring at the potion on his bedside cabinet, reminiscing on memories of Draco.

He didn't have many good memories of him, just a lot of agitating ones. He hadn't put much thought into what made Draco like him in the first place.

Harry sleepily blinked.

He remembered when he'd first talked to Draco, it was so long ago.

They were getting outfits tailored at Madam Malkin's and Draco was rambling on about being spoiled, becoming a Slytherin, insulting people — all of that nonsense. Course, that made Harry's blood boil, but he was talking about his passions innocently enough — but then again, those passions weren't so innocent.

Harry sat up, he just couldn't sleep.

Draco couldn't change, it was almost impossible for Harry to think what it would be like. Was it Draco's own decision to have those opinions?

Of course it was.

Right?

Harry grew up with the Dudley's yet never turned out to be like them. But Draco wasn't outcasted, he was the opposite, he was pampered. Was it Harry's own task to get to know Draco before making a decision on what he was going to do? Hermione would tell him "Yes", Ron would tell him "No", and Harry wouldn't know how to respond.

Obviously, Harry disliked him — even loathed him most of the time.

Draco never hesitated to mock anyone he found inferior. Why go with him when he could go with any other Gryffindor girl? A Gryffindor that wasn't so complicated.

The only light in the bedroom was the potion. Harry focused on how it's colour reflected onto the surroundings. It wasn't so bright anymore, much dimmer now than anything. Harry figured he should probably sleep if wanted to be able to get up in the morning.

Harry laid back down facing the drink, eyes drifting — then something peculiar happened. Instead of pink, the colour started turning into a dark navy blue with glowing bright red specks. Harry immediately sat up and grabbed the potion.

He quickly examined it, he shook it but it didn't change, he couldn't help but feel as if Draco wasn't okay, Harry thought another possibility was that Draco was thinking of someone else or he was starting to actually hate Harry.

* * *

  
Draco's face was smothered in his pillow. He was gripping his bed sheets so tight his knuckles were becoming white. His breathing was stuttering and he was shaking.

  
"Be quiet," he told himself through gritted teeth "Just shut up, everyone else is sleeping, pull yourself together."

He hated having these thoughts at night, thoughts of what could've been. He wasn't the good guy, he never would be. He kept thinking about what would happen if he was more like Harry, if he was with him, or anything to do with him, he just wanted something to do with him. He was angry, frustrated, he wanted to hate Harry. He wanted to get rid of any trace of him in his life, he wanted to just get rid of these thoughts.

He couldn't sleep like this, he needed to get up, go somewhere, somewhere not around other people. He stumbled out of his bed and out of his dorm, not caring he disturbed the other passing Slytherin students still in the Common Room, he stepped out onto the hall's floor. He didn't care if he got caught, he need to leave and fast. He began absent-mindedly walking down the corridor.

* * *

  
Harry shook the potion once again, a few pink swirls appeared but quickly faded. He hid the drink under his blanket so that the bright light didn't wake anyone up. He grabbed his Maurder's Map to see if Draco was in trouble and quickly whispered the correct words. Soon the map of the school spread throughout the paper, and so did the many dots.

Most of the dots were cluttered and squished into certain locations, like the dorms. Harry checked the time, it was midnight, everybody must be asleep by now. His eyes came across a stray dot with Draco's name under it, he was moving across the hallway of the school. Nothing seemed to be following him, the dot was moving in a continuous straight line.

"Mischief managed."

Harry closed the map and tucked it away. Harry knew if he didn't go to sleep now he'd be all groggy in the morning, but a lack of sleep hadn't stopped him before.

Harry quickly pulled on his robes and ran out of his dorm, out of the painting's hole, and found himself in the school's hallway. He should've brought the map with him, but Draco couldn't be far from the dungeon. He silently crept the corridors, trying to cause as little sound as possible.

Harry heard small echoes that resembled footsteps and he followed the sound. Harry was right, Draco wasn't far from the dungeon — Harry had just found him staring down at the floor, walking.

"Draco?"

Draco jumped. He turned around and saw him there, Harry was staring right at him. Draco left his wand at his dorm, he had no way to defend himself. He started slowly backing up.

"Leave. Me. Alone." Draco threatened, though — Harry thought it sounded more like a plea.

"Wait— just- Please! Wait!" Harry didn't even know what he was doing himself. Draco didn't move, he felt like he couldn't even if he wanted to. Harry slowly stepped towards Draco, taking note at how Draco flinched when he got very close. Soon, he and Draco were only a feet away from each other.

"Are you... okay?" Harry asked.

Draco swallowed.

"No" He answered honestly.

"Draco, do you..." Harry cleared his throat "Do you fancy me—  
Even a bit?"

Draco suddenly turned bitter.

"No— I would never- Why are you asking me in the first place? So you can tell everyone about how much of a freak I am?" Draco spat and started backing up again.

"What? No — hold on!" Harry grabbed Draco's hand.

Draco didn't know he felt about Harry doing that, but he did feel heat slowly crawl up his face. He started staring at Harry's hand that was in his own.

"You don't have to answer that question, let's just walk around."

Draco thought Harry was playing a cruel joke on him. But maybe he didn't care if Harry was, because the next thing that came out of his mouth was  
  
"Okay."

 

* * *

 

 

There they were, walking around the corridors, hand in hand. It was extremely silent for the first couple of minutes and then Draco spoke,

"You hate me, why are you doing this?" he mumbled.

"I thought you hated me too, you know."

"I thought I did too."

"So why don't you?"  
  
Draco scoffed.

"The only people who hate you, Potter, are the people who know they're wrong, and think they're winning a battle they're actually losing at."

"I never thought you'd say anything smart." Harry smiled. Draco avoided looking at him. "You admit you're wrong then?"

Draco didn't respond.

"You could use your brain more often, maybe with us," Harry commented.

"I can't."

"You could."

"I _really_ can't."

"And why is that?"

"Don't be stupid, Potter. I'm a Slytherin, a pure-blood, I can't be with you. I'm the opposite. What would everybody say if I was with you? What would everybody say if they saw you with me? They'd think we've gone mad." Draco grimaced at the thought of everyone mocking and taunting them.

"Pure-blood? You know, muggle-borns and half-bloods are just as much of a wizard as 'pure-bloods' are. Do you honestly care about what everyone thinks of you?"

"I do actually, unlike you."

Harry didn't respond to that — aside from shooting a glare at him. They both started walking back to the Gryffindor tower without looking at each other or talking.

Harry abruptly stopped beside the painting and Draco almost tripped. Draco turned around to face Harry, he was about to speak when suddenly Harry's fingers intertwined with his.

He felt his throat go dry.

"What-"

"When we go back to the dorms, do we just — just forget this ever happened?" Harry was looking straight into Draco's eyes yet Draco avoided glancing at Harry's altogether.

"Of course we do, It'd be exactly like before."

"I don't want that."

Draco looked right into Harry's eyes

"Don't be dense, you don't want me. Aren't you angry I always insult the people you care for? Aren't you mad that I use the term 'mudblood' for Hermione?" Draco's speech got more and more desperate."Don't you hate it when I call Weasley 'poor' or Hagrid 'oaf'?"

Harry gave him a doubtful look.

"I'm starting to think you hate it too."

Harry felt Draco's grip on his hand tighten and he wasn't looking at Harry anymore. Harry could see the sky getting brighter, he knew they needed to get sleep now or they couldn't get through the day later.

"Draco, look at me." And Draco did — reluctantly.

Harry had to stand on the tip of his shoes to give Draco a quick gentle kiss on the lips.

"See you soon, Draco." Harry tiredly mumbled, he walked back to the painting and got a quick scolding from the Fat Lady before entering his dorm, leaving Draco standing there, wide-eyed and lovestruck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the kind messages they mean a lot :^]  
> And that was the last chapter.  
> Hope you enjoyed reading!
> 
> shout out to my sister if she got this far into reading this


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